Sign Language is best utilized on billboards

Do not call me seven times in one day unless you’re dying and need someone to avenge your death

I am not the sort of woman you have over for tea and finger sandwiches. Unless they’re made with actual fingers.


Presented without comment.

Based on how hard it was to get Humpty Dumpty back together again, he was probably made by IKEA

There are few things in this world sexier than an intellectual equal. With a great a55